Crossroads
I am so caught at a crossroads. A new, strangely unfamiliar world, where convictions matter most and ambitions matter naught, beckons oh so feverishly in my heart. In this world, only a few are called, and fewer still are ultimately chosen. They are an exceptional kind, a “chosen generation,” profound in their knowledge (which they’d rather call “wisdom”), prudent on our reserves (which I’d readily call “chattels,”), yet abounding with tranquil delight (which we all know as “fulfillment.”)
In this world, as opposed to my world, a task is a calling and project is a burden that compels you to move mountains even while crouched so low or down on your very knees. In this world, there is much freedom and responsibility, not a set of rules, to pursue directions. In this world, only the called, not the driven, make the final cut.
In my current world, a task is a goading to realize commitments and deliver targets. It needs a “driven person” to push barriers for that all important need to broaden markets and produce profits. In my world, resources, all kinds of them, abound; and so are the rewards for what we’ve all come to want as “sweet success.” In this strange new world, a “called person” pushes frontiers to conquer even the thickest of thickets, with nary a resource but one ageless tome, and no tangible rewards lest you call one more fish cast unto the fisherman’s net a worthy recompense for a heart’s humble toil.
This world beckons, summoning me (or maybe not – yet - ) to seek something profound, something deep, not something extensive like knowledge or know-how, or expertise perhaps. It lures me to pursue burdens greater than my own feeble ones and no longer aspirations to gather as much as I was once determined to have.
I sit patiently now, mustering every ounce of strength to stay still …while waiting on my One. It continues to take much of my fortitude and patience I must say, but I trust that in waiting, there is a reaping that is most gratifying….
